I am a firm believer in the importance of precise language. I have seen time and time again Christians fall into divisions, disunity, and outright chastisement of each other because of confusion around the use of language. This issue of language is perhaps most prevalent in Christian conversations around LGBTQ+ issues. 

Over my 24+ years in Church, I have witnessed arguments of language dominate conversations around faith and sexuality. As a result of this absolutism, I believe the Church has missed a vital opportunity to minister and disciple entire populations of the Church. In this blog, I want to make a case for why we should stop policing Christians’ use of terms such as “gay Christian”, and how that can perhaps actually lead to greater discipleship and clarity around what a Christian sexual ethic can actually look like. I know I may have already caused some of you to cringe, get angry, or be skeptical. I realize many of you probably clicked on this post purely to argue against its provocative title, or because you wanted to read for yourself how I have “lost my way”. I hope and pray that you will stick around to read the entire post before making any rash judgments.

The Merriam-Webster dictionary would define ‘gay‘ and similarly ‘queer’ as “of, relating to, or characterized by sexual or romantic attraction to people of one’s same sex”, a definition which could be simplified to mean “a male who is attracted to other males or a female who is attracted to other females”.

If you asked any pastor in the Western world, “Could someone who experiences attraction to the same sex still be a Christian?” you would in most cases receive an enthusiastic “Yes!”. In every Christian tradition throughout all of the Church’s history Christianity has never required any lack of sexual or romantic attraction towards the same sex or otherwise. Why then have many in the church, including entire denominations, claimed that to identify as a “gay Christian” is inconsistent with a Christian witness?

If you do not have experience in the evangelical church this concept may be completely foreign to you. As most of the secular Western world sees it, identifying as queer is comparable to any other identifier such as Hispanic, disabled, father, wife, etc. Meaning, that being part of the LGBTQ+ community should have no more to do with your ability to be a Christian than being a part of a particular ethnic group or even being straight for that matter. In recent years in much of the Western Church, however, identifying as gay has often been criticized as being incompatible with the Christian faith.

This phenomenon is a rather recent argument made by people within the Church. As late as 1975, leaders like Billy Graham publicly backed ordaining gay Christians. He said as much in an article in the Atlanta Journal-Constitution titled, “Billy Graham Backs Ordaining Homosexuals”. He was asked by a journalist if he would support the ordination of a gay man to the Christian ministry, and he replied by speaking to the character of the man rather than his sexual orientation. He went on to say that requirements for Christian ministry rather than identifying as heterosexual were “turning away from their sins, receiving Christ, offering themselves to Christ and the ministry after repentance, and obtaining the proper training for the job.” ¹

John Stott advocated for a distinction between how Christians viewed sexual orientation and sexual ethics in a 1978 sermon, later collected in a book titled, Issues Facing Christians Today. He argued that sexual orientation is generally unchosen and relatively fixed, saying, “We may not blame people for what they are, though we may for what they do,” He went on to say, “In every discussion about homosexuality we must be rigorous in differentiating between this ‘being’ and ‘doing’, that is, between a person’s identity and activity, sexual preference and sexual practice, constitution, and conduct.”²

Many other Christian leaders spoke fondly of the gay community, all without compromising on their tradition’s view of a Christian sex ethic. C.S. Lewis spoke of one gay man as his ‘oldest and most intimate friend” ³. Francis Schaeffer along with many other evangelicals at the time opposed the ordination of sexually active queer men and women, yet made a clear distinction between someone’s orientation, and their sexual practices and ethics. He stated in a 1968 letter to a European pastor, “By definition, to be a homophile (a gay person) is a person who is born so that they have a natural tendency toward affection and sexual practice with their own sex… Not all homophiles practice homosexuality and not all who practice homosexuality were born homophiles.” ⁴

It wasn’t until the 1990s that an alternative way of discussing Christians who experienced attraction to the same sex was birthed. To this day, many Christians argue that the only faithful way of discussing or describing their experience of homosexuality is by identifying as “Same-Sex Attracted”, or in some cases simply saying they struggle or wrestle with same-sex attraction. Entire denominations put out statements implying this to be the only orthodox way of describing the queer experience while adhering to a historic Christian sexual ethic. ⁵

Given the intensity with which Western Christians seem to back the language of “same-sex attraction” over other queer identification, it may come to be a surprise that this description of people with a queer sexual/romantic orientation was not created by Christians at all. The first time we see any use of the term “same-sex attraction” was in the early 1980s used by secular sex researchers in clinical literature.⁶ Following its appearance in clinical sex research, secular therapists used the term as a means of conversion therapy. It wasn’t until 1994 that any reference to “same-sex attraction” appeared in religious circles. In the Mormon book titled Born That Way? A True Story of Overcoming Same-Sex Attraction, Erin Eldridge used the term in a nonclinical way within the context of an ex-gay conversion ministry a part of Mormonism.⁷ Three years later, Garrick and Ginger Hyde would publish a book titled A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction that used the language of “struggling with same-sex attraction” as a means of furthering the ex-gay movement known for harmful conversion therapy practices.⁸ It was not until the early 2000s that Protestants began to appropriate the term coined by secular sex researchers and popularized by Mormons promoting conversion therapy. Many of the early protestant uses of the phrase were linked to conversion therapeutic practices and ex-gay ministries.⁹ Most of these ministries were later discredited after it came out that attempts at sexual orientation changes were nearly entirely ineffective.¹⁰

The surprising roots of the term “same-sex attracted” have not kept it from becoming the main phrase many evangelicals demand people use in order to be accepted into churches and denominations. This fact is surprising given the evangelical tendency to shy away from the use of practices rooted in secular or non-Christian ideology. This form of gatekeeping is often a main source of tension between the queer community and the evangelical church. While various traditions and denominations hold to various interpretations of the Christian sexual ethic, the policing of language seems to be the center of most debates surrounding the queer community and Christian faith. According to Andrew Martin, 76% of LGBTQ+ people who have left the Christian faith are open to returning, a jarring jump from just 9% of the general population.¹¹ For many in the LGBTQ+ community, leaving a church or even the faith entirely had little to do with an unwillingness to participate in the tradition’s sexual ethics. Instead many leave as a result of being discriminated against for their attractions, orientation, or the way in which they identify or act outside of sexual activity.¹²

Seeing that disagreements around sexual ethics seem to be less pressing for those who are leaving the Church in droves, the question arises why churches and individuals would hold so tightly to these sex researchers, conversion therapists, or perhaps generously, Mormon terms of sexuality. Without addressing the Church of Latter-day Saints further, which to this day has a statement forbidding queer identification¹³, many Protestant Christians still prefer the “same-sex attraction” terminology. Many even argue that to identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, etc. is antithetical to the Christian witness. That it is placing identity in sin rather than in Christ¹⁴. There are several major issues with this interpretation.

Identifying as queer does not inherently mean identifying with sin. While the debate has been growing in recent years on whether the historic interpretation of scripture is an accurate and helpful one for a modern Christian sex ethic, identification within the queer community is not synonymous with a particular sexual ethic or activity. As previously noted, for most of the Christian world prior to the infamous “ex-gay movement”, referring to sexual orientation had no moral value apart from a further statement about one’s sexual activity. Furthermore, apart from some Christian circles, most people follow the plain definitions of gay, lesbian, and queer. Put simply, to be gay is simply to be someone attracted to the same sex as you, which in most of Western secular culture holds no moral weight or particular sexual ethic.

To insist that identifying as queer means one is renouncing the Christian faith is inconsistent with the Church’s general stance on other so-called “identification with sin”. There seems to be no substantial pushback on the rather successful program for those battling alcohol addiction. Alcoholics Anonymous, originally started by Christian influence, is known widely for its first step to recovery: admitting you are an alcoholic.¹⁵ Churches across the world have historically partnered with and participated in Alcoholics Anonymous. This seems to contradict the assertion that not identifying with sin is essential to the Christian faith.

The assertion that someone cannot identify with a so-called sin, is also inconsistent with scripture. Listed among the Hall of Faith in Hebrews 11, is “Rahab the prostitute”. Even if the identification as queer held inherent sexual deviance that was seen as sinful in a Christian sexual ethic, we can clearly see that identification with one’s sexual deviance does not exclude someone from the kingdom of God. In fact, Rahab’s listing among the other heroes of faith is perhaps a clear indication that one’s identification with a marginalized group associated with sexual defiance can be a witness to the world of the redeeming power of Christ. Perhaps the queer-identifying Christian, like Rahab, can be a symbol of the gospel, which does not require more than faith and allegiance to Christ. Perhaps the identity of a sexual minority does negate the title of faithful one.

Seeing beyond even this debate, one could point out the faults in teachings on “identity”. The prominent message of “identity in Christ” is a rather new concept. In fact, upon searching for Christian teachings on “placing identity in Christ” it is nearly impossible to find any relative messages prior to the 1980s.¹⁶ This is in large part due to the rise of the self-focus that the late 1900s brought to the Western world.

Arguments made that we must place our “identity” in Christ often carried the negative side effect of undermining other identities given to us through scripture by God, such as that of sons, daughters, mothers, and fathers. While scripture lifts up the specific and important roles that various members of a family hold, arguments that our identity should be in Christ alone seem antithetical to the emphasis placed on particular identities within the family of God. Additionally, to make the argument that one is not part of a particular nationality is to negate the specific time and boundaries which God created for that person to reside in (Acts 17:26).

Alternatively, teaching union with Christ (Colossians 3:3-4) offers a far more theologically robust contemplation of the Christian life. Union with Christ does not require that we set aside the other identities we hold, but rather that they be joined with him. The Gentiles did not forgo their ethnic identity but rather were unified with Christ in their Gentile identity. In fact, the highlighting of the difference between Jew and Gentile was perhaps critical to the furthering of the gospel and the growth of the early Church. Rahab need not shed the title of a prostitute, for her union with God through her faith placed her within the kingdom of God. Union with Christ supposes a far greater truth for us, that when we become in Christ when we are baptized into this faith, we are unified with him. This truth proclaims good news for all; for Rahab, who was unified with Christ even carrying the identity of a prostitute, for the mother who is unified with Christ yet does not lose her motherhood distinction, and her God-given calling as a mother, and for the queer woman who has been attracted to women her whole life, yet comes under the Lordship of Christ. If you desire to learn more about the distinction between identity in Christ and union with him, Caleb Morell offers fantastic insight in his article, Stop Finding Your Identity in Christ.¹⁷

Some may beg the question, why is identifying as queer important? People may carry a variety of personal reasons, but perhaps the most important of reasons someone may give is also the most jarring one. According to the Injury Control Research Center at West Virginia University in Morgantown, research has shown that queer people who stay in Church are 30-55% more likely to die by suicide if they stay within the Church than if they leave.¹⁸ Notably, in other studies of every population besides those who identify as LGBTQ+, suicide risk decreases with Church involvement.¹⁹ For many, being told they cannot be a gay Christian is interpreted as them being deemed ineligible to receive the free gift of eternal life. For many young people whose homosexual orientation seems to be relatively fixed, (that is in most cases) being told they cannot be queer and Christian is analogous to being told they cannot be a Christian. There seems to be no hope offered for those who wish to follow Christ, but cannot seem to see substantial change in their orientation.

Language is of vital importance in this conversation, because if we are not precise with our language, we are effectively teaching a false gospel, one that excludes the marginalized, and ostracizes the sexual minority. While different traditions and denominations have varying interpretations of what the Christian sexual ethic entails, to assert that one cannot be gay and Christian is to preach an exclusionary gospel. It may be entirely possible to welcome and support many queer Christians, without changing the Christian sexual ethic upheld in your tradition. In fact, many LGBTQ+ identifying Christians desire to be included and wanted within various traditions with more conservative sexual ethics. For those desiring to submit to a traditional Christian sexual ethic, having space for queer identification could be the difference between someone staying faithful throughout their life, or walking away due to a false understanding of the gospel.

Sources:

1: UPI, “Billy Graham Backs Ordaining Homosexuals,” Atlanta Journal Constitution, July 25,1975, 21.

2: Stott, Issues Facing Christians Today, 303.

3: C.S. Lewis, Surprised by Joy (New York: Houghton Mifflin Harcourt, 1956), 97.

4: Francis A. Schaeffer, Letters of Francis Schaeffer (Westchester, IL: Crossway, 1985), 193-95.

5: “On Sexuality and Personal Identity.” SBC. June 23, 2023. https://www.sbc.net/resource-library/resolutions/on-sexuality-and-personal-identity/.

6: A 2021 Google n-gram search of the phrase “same-sex attraction” showed almost no use of the term in volumes within Google Books before 1981.

7:Erin Eldridge, Born This Way? A True Story of Overcoming Same-Sex Attraction (Salt Lake City: Deseret, 1994).

8:Garrick Hyde and Ginger Hyde, A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction (Salt Lake City: Century,1997).

9:Richard Cohen, Coming Out Straight (Oakhill Press, 2001).

10: “What Does the Scholarly Research Say about Whether Conversion Therapy Can Alter Sexual Orientation without Causing Harm?” What We Know, August 18, 2021. https://whatweknow.inequality.cornell.edu/topics/lgbt-equality/what-does-the-scholarly-research-say-about-whether-conversion-therapy-can-alter-sexual-orientation-without-causing-harm/.

11:Marin, Andrew P. US versus us: The untold story of religion and the LGBT community. Colorado Springs: NavPress, 2016.

12:Woodell, Brandi, and Philip Schwadel. 2020. “Changes in Religiosity among Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual Emerging Adults.” Journal for the Scientific Study of Religion 59 (2): 379–96. https://doi.org/10.1111/jssr.12653.

13: Oaks, President Dallin H., Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, and Elder Marlin K. Jensen. “Same-Sex Attraction.” The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Accessed June 21, 2023. https://site.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/manual/gospel-topics/same-sex-attraction?lang=eng&adobe_mc_ref=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.churchofjesuschrist.org%2Fstudy%2Fmanual%2Fgospel-topics%2Fsame-sex-attraction.

14:Butterfield, Dr. Rosaria. “The Misplaced Identity of Gay Christianity.” Answers in Genesis, April 26, 2021. https://answersingenesis.org/christianity/christian-life/misplaced-identity-gay-christianity/.

15:“The Twelve Steps.” Alcoholics Anonymous. Accessed June 21, 2023. https://www.aa.org/the-twelve-steps.

16:Morell, Caleb. “Stop Finding Your Identity in Christ: Caleb Morell.” American Reformer, April 27, 2022. https://americanreformer.org/2022/02/stop-finding-your-identity-in-christ/.

17: Ibid.

18: bit.ly/2qt3gYC American Journal of Preventive Medicine, online March 15, 2018.

19: Sweeney, Chris. “Regularly Attending Religious Services Associated with Lower Risk of Deaths of Despair.” News, May 6, 2020. https://www.hsph.harvard.edu/news/press-releases/regularly-attending-religious-services-associated-with-lower-risk-of-deaths-of-despair/.

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